Funnies for the day

[t_jolt]

> RECENT STUDY FOUND OUT WHICH DAYS MEN PREFER TO HAVE SEX. IT
WAS FOUND THAT MEN PREFERRED TO ENGAGE IN SEXUAL ACTIVITY ON THE DAYS
THAT STARTED WITH THE LETTER 'T'.
> EXAMPLES :
>
> TUESDAY
> THURSDAY
> TODAY
> TOMORROW
> THANKSGIVING
> THATURDAY
> THUNDAY
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
> A RECENT SURVEY WAS CONDUCTED ALSO TO DISCOVER WHY MEN GET OUT
OF BED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. HERE ARE THE SURVEY RESULTS:
>
> 5% SAID IT WAS TO GET A GLASS OF WATER
> 12% SAID IT WAS TO GO TO THE BATHROOM
> 83% SAID IT WAS TO GO HOME
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
> THE PERFECT BREAKFAST...AS A MAN SEES IT.....
>
> YOU'RE SITTING AT THE TABLE AND YOUR SON IS ON THE COVER OF
WHEATIES......
> YOUR MISTRESS IS ON THE COVER OF PLAYBOY........
> AND YOUR WIFE IS ON THE BACK OF THE MILK CARTON.
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
> WHAT'S THE BEST FORM OF BIRTH CONTROL AFTER 50?
>
> NUDITY
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
> What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
>
> ABOUT 45 LBS.
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
> WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A BOYFRIEND AND A HUSBAND?
>
> ABOUT 45 MINUTES
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
> WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SOUTHERN ZOO AND A NORTHERN
ZOO?
> A SOUTHERN ZOO HAS A DESCRIPTION OF THE ANIMAL ON THE FRONT OF
THE CAGE, ALONG WITH A RECIPE.
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
> WHAT'S THE CUBAN NATIONAL ANTHEM?
> ROW, ROW, ROW YOUR BOAT........
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
> WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A NORTHERN FAIRYTALE AND A
SOUTHERN FAIRYTALE ?
> A NORTHERN FAIRYTALE BEGINS.......... 'ONCE UPON A TIME.....'
> AND A SOUTHERN FAIRYTALE BEGINS.........'Y'ALL AIN'T GONNA
BELIEVE THIS SHIT'
>