Porn Federal Bail Out.

[Ceez]

http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2009/01/07/porn-industry-seeks-federal-bailout/#more-34724

WASHINGTON (CNN) — Another major American industry is asking for assistance as the global financial crisis continues: Hustler publisher Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis said Wednesday they will request that Congress allocate $5 billion for a bailout of the adult entertainment industry.
“The take here is that everyone and their mother want to be bailed out from the banks to the big three,” said Owen Moogan, spokesman for Larry Flynt. “The porn industry has been hurt by the downturn like everyone else and they are going to ask for the $5 billion. Is it the most serious thing in the world? Is it going to make the lives of Americans better if it happens? It is not for them to determine.”
Francis said in a statement that “the US government should actively support the adult industry's survival and growth, just as it feels the need to support any other industry cherished by the American people."
“We should be delivering [the request] by the end of today to our congressmen and [Secretary of the Treasury Henry] Paulson asking for this $5 billion dollar bailout,” he told CNN Wednesday.

Flynt and Francis concede the industry itself is in no financial danger — DVD sales have slipped over the past year, but Web traffic has continued to grow.
But the industry leaders said the issue is a nation in need. "People are too depressed to be sexually active," Flynt said in the statement. "This is very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such but they cannot do without sex."
"With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind. It's time for congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America. The only way they can do this is by supporting the adult industry and doing it quickly."
So far, there has been no congressional reaction to the request.
–CNN’s Chloe Melas contributed to this report

[Nick_Ninja]

http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2009/01/07/porn-industry-seeks-federal-bailout/#more-34724

WASHINGTON (CNN) — Another major American industry is asking for assistance as the global financial crisis continues: Hustler publisher Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis said Wednesday they will request that Congress allocate $5 billion for a bailout of the adult entertainment industry.
“The take here is that everyone and their mother want to be bailed out from the banks to the big three,” said Owen Moogan, spokesman for Larry Flynt. “The porn industry has been hurt by the downturn like everyone else and they are going to ask for the $5 billion. Is it the most serious thing in the world? Is it going to make the lives of Americans better if it happens? It is not for them to determine.”
Francis said in a statement that “the US government should actively support the adult industry's survival and growth, just as it feels the need to support any other industry cherished by the American people."
“We should be delivering [the request] by the end of today to our congressmen and [Secretary of the Treasury Henry] Paulson asking for this $5 billion dollar bailout,” he told CNN Wednesday.

Flynt and Francis concede the industry itself is in no financial danger — DVD sales have slipped over the past year, but Web traffic has continued to grow.
But the industry leaders said the issue is a nation in need. "People are too depressed to be sexually active," Flynt said in the statement. "This is very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such but they cannot do without sex."
"With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind. It's time for congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America. The only way they can do this is by supporting the adult industry and doing it quickly."
So far, there has been no congressional reaction to the request.
–CNN’s Chloe Melas contributed to this report

I seriously doubt that.

[64BonnieLass]

OMG, now I've heard it all. Seriously??!! Should this be in the jokes section.

I'm pretty sure the entire economy and life as we know it will not all collapse without Pron.

You guys already have all you need saved on DVD anyway.

This request takes some balls. :banghead:

[SaShWhO]

If porn goes down I'm leaving the planet:alien:

[Matty]

Just so you know there was a rise in porn purchases after 911.

[Ceez]

Just so you know there was a rise in porn purchases after 911.


He's right...especially the online porn industry...sky rocketed. These are the companies you need to invest in. I mean, what else are you going to do if you get laid off from your job ? :jerkoff:

[64BonnieLass]

I mean, what else are you going to do if you dont have a job ? :jerkoff:

Buy a motorcycle. Ride it. A LOT!! :)

[rforsythe]

Porn and prostitution are perhaps the only industries in the history of man that have literally outlived wars, recessions, governmental collapse, plague, and anything else. Never underestimate the power of the boner.

[Ceez]

Never underestimate the power of the boner.


:spit:I just found my next tattoo....now to figure out a place to put that saying! :hump:

[asp_125]

$5B in clams from the govt to give a rise to a limp sales? Why do we need this, the taxpayer is already getting screwed. ;) :hump:

[puckstr]

PORN is GOD

[SaShWhO]

PORN is GOD
AMEN BRUTHA
I frequent his church

[Snowman]

If the American people are to invest their taxes in a bail out what better industry than pornography. Whenever a new technology has emerged pornography was the first profitable use of it. They are leaders in new marketing strategies to reach their target audience. Always the leader in innovating new and interesting products. They are the true face of capitalism.

I whole hearty indorse this plan with the caveat that we must share in the profits from this venture. A no safer place can one put their 401Ks.

We must save this great American institution of capitalism because a world without porn is like… Ahh hmmm… a world without porn.

[Shea]

:no:

How about no more bailouts for anyone?

[McVaaahhh]

That's great.

I think everyone is missing the point. Flynt loves to turn the screws on politicians and he's just poking fun at the "system". If the auto-industry can get $5 billion, why can't the porn industry? They aren't really asking for the money to help themselves, but making a point that in this economy everyone is hurting a bit, why is the gov't only bailing out banks and car companies?

[salsashark]

That's great.

I think everyone is missing the point. Flynt loves to turn the screws on politicians and he's just poking fun at the "system". If the auto-industry can get $5 billion, why can't the porn industry? They aren't really asking for the money to help themselves, but making a point that in this economy everyone is hurting a bit, why is the gov't only bailing out banks and car companies?

ding ding ding!!!

Gutter, tell him what he's won!

[SumoWeezle]

:imwithstupid:

Flynt is my hero! All of the bailouts are ridiculous and he's making a point about it.

[Captain Obvious]

:spit:I just found my next tattoo....now to figure out a place to put that saying! :hump:

Perhaps on your penis.Or is that too obvious?

When limp it would read "Never" on one side, and "boner" on the other like little racing stripes.
When erect it would read "Never underestimate the power of the boner."

You could wrap it around length-wise so when a girl, or whatever, is looking down the barrel, it would say POW, but you wouldn't have to get the O tattooed.

[CYCLE_MONKEY]

I'd have rather bailed out the porn industry than the banking industry!

[rforsythe]

I whole hearty indorse this plan with the caveat that we must share in the profits from this venture. A no safer place can one put their 401Ks.


I wish I could do that, honestly!! It's really a "growth" industry.

[Ceez]

Perhaps on your penis.Or is that too obvious?

When limp it would read "Never" on one side, and "boner" on the other like little racing stripes.
When erect it would read "Never underestimate the power of the boner."

You could wrap it around length-wise so when a girl, or whatever, is looking down the barrel, it would say POW, but you wouldn't have to get the O tattooed.

Good call, but I already have the word AIDS tattood on there, but when I get excited it says ADIDAS and has the Adidas symbols on either side....damn college bets.


I wish I could do that, honestly!! It's really a "growth" industry.

I would be willing to make a deposit! :hump:

[Nick_Ninja]

I'd have rather bailed out the porn industry than the banking industry!

Both industries are into screwing someone and cashing in.

[Captain Obvious]

Adidas symbols on either side



You should just pretend those are stretch marks.

[Vance]

If porn goes down I'm leaving the planet:alien:

How very Dr. Manhattan of you.

[Captain Obvious]

I'd have rather bailed out the porn industry than the banking industry!


Me too, but the difference is that I don't care if my mom finds out I go into a bank.

So no money for Flint, but like Timothy said, it is really just to piss off Washington.

[Ceez]

You should just pretend those are stretch marks.


Good call...:slappers:

[ghostrider_9]

Yeah, he's just stirring the proverbial pot. . . .

[CYCLE_MONKEY]

Both industries are into screwing someone and cashing in.
Yeah, but at least porn is honest about it!:)

[thatmofo]

Buy a motorcycle. Ride it. A LOT!! :)

Word.

[~Barn~]

I have an enormous box of porn. It's just taking up room in the closet. Make me an offer.

[Ceez]

I have an enormous box of porn. It's just taking up room in the closet. Make me an offer.


I will trade you my box of porn for yours. I am getting sick of "On Golden Blonde" and "Alvin IN the chipmunks".

[~Barn~]

Nice.

The box of mine is full of magazines though. :lol:

[puckstr]

I have an enormous box of porn. It's just taking up room in the closet. Make me an offer.


All I can think of is the scene from "The 40 year old Virgin"

Andy Stitzer (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0136797/): Take your porn with you.
David (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0748620/): I'm not taking it.
Andy Stitzer (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0136797/): [following David to the front door] Take your box o' porn!
David (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0748620/): It's my gift to you.
Andy Stitzer (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0136797/): No, I don't want it. David it's not... just... just...
David (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0748620/): [shouting] Andy for the last time, I don't want your giant box of pornography!
Andy Stitzer (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0136797/): No no no, just- Come on man! So uncool!
David (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0748620/): No...
[continues shouting]
David (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0748620/): Uncool? Uncool is trying to give an honest man a big box of porn, Andy!