Tink
Wed Mar 16th, 2005, 04:02 PM
-----: Honey Lips
>
> Honey Lips and Marshmellow Face...
>
> A couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband,
although
> very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and
party
>with
> his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be
right
>back."
> Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.
>
> "I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face. I'm going to have a beer."
>
> The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door
to
> the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer,
brands
>from
> 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
>
> The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he
could
> think of saying was, "Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... you
know...
>they
> have frozen glasses... "
>
> He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife
interrupted
> him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?" She took
a
>huge
> beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting
chills
>just
> holding it.
>
> The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but
at
> the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really
delicious...
>I
> won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
>
> "You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the oven
and
>took
> out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs
in
>blankets,
> mushroom caps, and pork strips.
>
> "But my sweet honey... at the bar.... you know .there's
swearing,
> dirty words and all that..."
>
> "You want dirty words, Cutie Pie?... "LISTEN UP DICKHEAD! SIT
DOWN,
> SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR DAMN BEER IN YOUR DAMN FROZEN MUG
AND
>EAT
> YOUR FRICKING HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T
GOING TO
>A
> FRICKING BAR! THAT SHIT IS OVER...GOT IT, ASSHOLE?"
>
> ...and, they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet
story?
>
> Honey Lips and Marshmellow Face...
>
> A couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband,
although
> very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and
party
>with
> his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be
right
>back."
> Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.
>
> "I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face. I'm going to have a beer."
>
> The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door
to
> the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer,
brands
>from
> 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
>
> The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he
could
> think of saying was, "Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... you
know...
>they
> have frozen glasses... "
>
> He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife
interrupted
> him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?" She took
a
>huge
> beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting
chills
>just
> holding it.
>
> The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but
at
> the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really
delicious...
>I
> won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
>
> "You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the oven
and
>took
> out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs
in
>blankets,
> mushroom caps, and pork strips.
>
> "But my sweet honey... at the bar.... you know .there's
swearing,
> dirty words and all that..."
>
> "You want dirty words, Cutie Pie?... "LISTEN UP DICKHEAD! SIT
DOWN,
> SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR DAMN BEER IN YOUR DAMN FROZEN MUG
AND
>EAT
> YOUR FRICKING HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T
GOING TO
>A
> FRICKING BAR! THAT SHIT IS OVER...GOT IT, ASSHOLE?"
>
> ...and, they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet
story?