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Thread: We must be idiots...

  1. #1
    OG, y0! Site Admin Jenny's Avatar
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    We must be idiots...

    ---- taken from http://www.funnyjunk.com/pages/funny_instructions.htm ----

    Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods...

    On Sears hairdryer:
    Do not use while sleeping.
    (Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

    On a bag of Fritos:
    You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
    (The shoplifter special!)

    On a bar of Dial soap:
    Directions: Use like regular soap.
    (and that would be how?)

    On some Swann frozen dinners:
    Serving suggestion: Defrost.
    (But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

    On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
    Do not turn upside down.
    (Too late! you lose!)

    On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
    Product will be hot after heating.
    (Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

    On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
    Do not iron clothes on body.
    (But wouldn't that save more time?)(Whose body?)

    On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
    Do not drive car or operate machinery.
    (We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

    On Nytol sleep aid:
    Warning: may cause drowsiness.
    (One would hope!)

    On a Korean kitchen knife:
    Warning: keep out of children.
    (hmm...something must have gotten lost in the translation...)

    On a string of Christmas lights:
    For indoor or outdoor use only.
    (As opposed to use in outer space.)

    On a food processor:
    Not to be used for the other use.
    (Now I'm curious.)

    On Sainsbury's peanuts:
    Warning: contains nuts.
    (but no peas?)

    On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
    Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
    (somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)

    On a Swedish chainsaw:
    Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
    (Raise your hand if you've tried this...)

    On a child's Superman costume:
    Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
    (Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

    E-mail this page to your friends!

    ------------------------
    Student Driver Racing / My Little Pony Racing
    Aerobics instructor seeks optical illusion...#502, baby

  2. #2
    Senior Member Brizz's Avatar
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    Re: We must be idiots...

    on the burger king drive thru menu it says 'picture menu avalable upon request'
    Proud Sponsor/pit crew to: -PUCK-MRA #719
    R.I.P 502

  3. #3
    Gold Member Yearly Supporter McVaaahhh's Avatar
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    Re: We must be idiots...

    Quote Originally Posted by Brizz";p="154604
    on the burger king drive thru menu it says 'picture menu avalable upon request'
    Just like the braille buttons on drive-up ATM's.
    '02 RC-51 - Street
    '05 Pitster Pro 125 - Pitbike madness

    Be polite. Be professional. But be prepared to kill everyone you meet.

    "Motorcycles tell us a more useful truth: we are small and exposed, and probably moving too fast for our own good, but that's no reason not to enjoy every minute of the ride."
    ~Dave Karlotski

  4. #4
    Senior Member Brizz's Avatar
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    Re: We must be idiots...

    there is a reason for that. they are mass produced.
    Proud Sponsor/pit crew to: -PUCK-MRA #719
    R.I.P 502

  5. #5
    Gold Member salsashark's Avatar
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    Re: We must be idiots...

    Quote Originally Posted by Jenny";p="154603
    On a Swedish chainsaw:
    Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
    (Raise your hand if you've tried this...)
    Well, at least raise what's left...
    Do not put off living the life you dream of. Next year may never come. If we are always waiting for something to change...
    Retirement, the kids to leave home, the weather or the economy, that's not living. That's waiting!
    Waiting will only leaves us with unrealized dreams and empty wishes.

  6. #6
    Senior Member
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    BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    That was awesome!!! Thanks!

  7. #7
    Nuclear Wessel King Nothing's Avatar
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    bob is a punk.

  8. #8
    Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by kingnothing";p="154760
    bob is a punk.
    Watch it, Doug!

  9. #9
    Nuclear Wessel King Nothing's Avatar
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    What I meant to say was, Bob is the coolest guy i know. next to ralph.

  10. #10
    Gold Member Bueller's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spiderman";p="154789
    Quote Originally Posted by kingnothing";p="154760
    bob is a punk.
    Watch it, Doug!
    Give him a week in the hole and we can all go watch him postwhore jones.


  11. #11
    OG, y0! Site Admin Jenny's Avatar
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    THROW HIM IN THE BRIG!

    ------------------------
    Student Driver Racing / My Little Pony Racing
    Aerobics instructor seeks optical illusion...#502, baby

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