Results 1 to 3 of 3

Thread: Heaven's Pets

  1. #1
    Senior Member dapper's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    This Universe
    Posts
    1,478

    Heaven's Pets

    Author Unknown

    A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead. He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years. He wondered where the road was leading them.

    After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble. At the top of a long hill, it was broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight. When he was standing before it he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like mother-of-pearl, and the street that led to the gate looked like pure gold. He and the dog walked toward the gate, and as he got closer, he saw a man at a desk to one side. When he was close enough, he called out, "Excuse me, where are we?"

    "This is Heaven, sir," the man answered.

    "Wow! Would you happen to have some water?" the man asked.

    "Of course, sir. Come right in, and I'll have some ice water brought right up." The man gestured, and the gate began to open.

    "Can my friend," gesturing toward his dog, "come in, too?" the traveler asked.

    "I'm sorry, sir, but we don't accept pets."

    The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and continued the way he had been going with his dog. After another long walk, and at the top of another long hill, he came to a dirt road leading through a farm gate that looked as if it had never been closed. There was no fence. As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree and reading a book.

    "Excuse me!" he called to the man. "Do you have any water?"

    "Yeah, sure, there's a pump over there, come on in."

    "How about my friend here?" the traveler gestured to the dog.

    "There should be a bowl by the pump."

    They went through the gate, and sure enough, there was an old-fashioned hand pump with a bowl beside it. The traveler filled the water bowl and took a long drink himself, then he gave some to the dog. When they were full, he and the dog walked back toward the man who was standing by the tree.

    "What do you call this place?" the traveler asked.

    "This is Heaven," he answered.

    "Well, that's confusing," the traveler said. "The man down the road said that was Heaven, too."

    "Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates? Nope. That's hell."

    "Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name like that?"

    "No, we're just happy that they screen out the folks who would leave their best friends behind."
    It works! Slow in, Fast out
    "Sarcasm is difficult to convey on the internet, especially if the people reading it don't know you personally". By Spiderman
    Neither irony nor sarcasm is argument. By Rufus Choate
    Be smart, be nice, do what'cha love and always have fun.
    Let food be your medicine, and medicine be your food. - Hippocrates
    I will use treatment to help the sick. I will never use it to injure them or wrong them. I will not give poison to anyone. - The Hippocratic Oath

  2. #2
    Senior Member TFOGGuys's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Location
    What am I doing in this handbasket?
    Posts
    3,838

    Re: Heaven's Pets

    I just aspire to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am.
    Thanks, Jim
    TFOG Wheelsports, LLC
    www.tfogracing.com
    303-216-2400

    Calling an illegal alien an "undocumented immigrant" is like calling a drug dealer an "undocumented pharmacist"



  3. #3
    AKA "Devaclis"
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Occupy CSC Fuck You Ralph
    Posts
    19,633

    Re: Heaven's Pets

    Ver-a Nice
    First rule of the internet: *bleep* you and everything you stand for. Second rule of the internet: FKZOR U AND RRYTHING U STND FR!

Similar Threads

  1. Pets???
    By Slo in forum Pics and Videos
    Replies: 65
    Last Post: Fri Feb 23rd, 2007, 06:23 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •