12 thoughts for the day
12. Life is sexually transmitted.
11. Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
10. Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
9. Give a person a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
8. Some people are like Slinkies... not really good for anything, but you can't help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.
7. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
6. Whenever I start feeling blue, I start breathing again.
5. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
4. Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a
substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents.
3. In the 60's people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
2. Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
And the # 1 THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: Most "terrorists" are reported to
have come to the US legally, but they then hang around on expired visas, some for as long as 10 to 15 years. Now compare that to Blockbuster, and if you are 2 days late with a video, those people are
all over you. Should Blockbuster be in charge of immigration?
Bumper Stickers
To All You Virgins: Thanks For Nothing.
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Impotence: Nature's Way Of Saying "No Hard Feelings"
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If You Can Read This, I've Lost My Trailer
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Horn Broken... Watch For Finger
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Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway
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Illiterate? Write For Help
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Honk If Anything Falls Off
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Cover Me, I'm Changing Lanes
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If You Can Read This, Please Flip Me Back Over...
(Seen Upside Down On A Jeep)
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Remember Folks:
Stop Lights Timed For 35mph Are Also Timed For 70mph
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Guys: No Shirt, No Service
Gals: No Shirt, No Charge
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Ax Me About Ebonics
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Caution - Driver Legally Blonde §§^_^§§
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Heart Attacks ...
God's Revenge For Eating His Animal Friends
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WANTED: Meaningful Overnight Relationship
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Beauty Is In The Eye Of The Beer Holder
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