*Pushes soapbox into the center of the room and proceeds to stand on it. *

Women, what in gawds green earth makes you think that if you can bang 5/6 up and 1 down while upright on 2, that any guy that approaches you is only doing so to get the numbers to hook up later? Here I have something for you, here is a spoon so that you can eat my ass!

Get this, I head out during lunch to get my bikes race numbers for the SMRI race #2 this weekend and I stop for some fuel. While I am letting my trusty 1k treat herself to some fine 91, a woman on a CBR600rr pulls up to the pump behind me. She arrives in all her “ hey look at me I am girl” splendor adorn in a nice Joe Rocket jacket and gloves. However miss smarty pants has no skid lid so that everyone can see that she is a chick… First clue…ATTENTION WHORE!
I walk in and pay for my fuel and walk over to my bike to grab a flyer for the SMRI street riders track day that will be held on 6/5. *Yes I keep them in my bike, and yes I give them to everyone on 2 wheels* I turn to approach her and we make eye contact just before they begin to roll back in her head. As I get closer to her I say, “Hi, I thought I would give you” she then interrupts and say’s “I don’t need another phone number.” This pissed me off… so in my normal, charming, and smartass way I say, “first off, I have a wife that could ride circles around you. Secondly, your not as HOT as you think you are. I was simply giving you a flier for a local track day, however you can use it to fill the void left in your ass once you remove your head from it.” At that point she proclaimed some babble that was completely incoherent to me as I strapped my brain bucket on and rode away…

Just because you have baby feeders, a cock-cozy and know how to ride a bike does not mean everyone wants you… MAN, some day women will learn to look past their nipples, till then GO MAKE ME A PIE!

I will step off my soapbox now.

Sorry had to get that off my chest