Happy Thanksgiving‏

[Nick_Ninja]

A game warden was driving down the road when he came upon a young boy carrying a wild turkey under his arm.

He stopped and asked the boy, 'Where did you get that turkey?'

The boy replied, 'What turkey?'

The game warden said, 'That turkey you're carrying under your arm.'

The boy looks down and said, 'Well, lookee here, a turkey done roosted
under my arm!'

The game warden said, 'Now look, you know turkey season is closed, so
whatever you do to that turkey, I'm going to do to you.

If you break his leg, I'm gonna break your leg. If you break his wing,
I'll break your arm. Whatever you do to him, I'll do to you. So, what are
you gonna do with him?'

The little boy said, 'I guess I'll just kiss his ass and let him go!'


May your stuffing be tasty
May your turkey plump,
May your potatoes and gravy
Have never a lump.
May your yams be delicious
And your pies take the prize,
And may your Thanksgiving dinner
Stay off your thighs!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL OF YOU!!!!!

[64BonnieLass]

See?! You are just a big teddy bear deep down aren't ya Jeff? Awww how swee...Whoops, it's in the jokes section. Nevermind.

[Sortarican]

That joke was a turkey....

I mean really fowl.....

Though it did give me some food for thought.....

So I guess anything more is just gravy.



(OK, I'll stop now.)

[Pandora-11]

Husband and wife grilling out in the backyard. Husband says to wife, "Honey, your butt is getting really big. In fact it's getting so big that I bet it's bigger than this barbecue. Hey...here's a tape measure...let's measure."
Husband measures and finds out that indeed the butt is bigger than the barbecue and says so. Later that evening in bed when husband is feeling a little frisky, wife turns her back to him. "What's the matter honey?" he asks.
Wife says, "What? Fire up this big ole barbecue butt for one little weenie?"

[Pandora-11]

I'm bumping this because...hey...I thought that was a really good joke.

[dirkterrell]

I'm bumping this because...hey...I thought that was a really good joke.

Joke?!?!?! Does anyone have the slightest doubt that the boy in this story was none other than Jeff himself?

Dirk

[Pandora-11]

Joke?!?!?! Does anyone have the slightest doubt that the boy in this story was none other than Jeff himself?

Dirk

Hey...I was talking about MY joke.....

[Nick_Ninja]

Hey...I was talking about MY joke.....

It's not nice to talk about yourself

[Pandora-11]

It's not nice to talk about yourself

You're SOOOOO cute!

[Nick_Ninja]

John received a parrot as an early Christmas gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse
vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity.

John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing
soft music and anything else he could think of to 'clean up' the bird's vocabulary. Finally, John was
fed up, and he yelled at the parrot…….the parrot yelled back.

John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. John, in desperation, threw up his
hands, grabbed the bird and shoved him in the freezer.

For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total
silence. Not a peep was heard for over a minute.

Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer.

The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said “I believe I may have offended
you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions
and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior.”

John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had
made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird continued....
........“May I inquire as to what the turkey did?”

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL………

[64BonnieLass]

I just choked on my M&M's. Pretty funny!